DOUCHEBAG OF THE WEEK: HOLLYWOOD

Yes even in a world where politicians like Charles Rangel have to be explained that what they did was wrong as if they were a five year old child, where BP gets away with murder, where right wing nutbags look fondly back on the days of George Bush, Hollywood has shown that they too can make douchebag decisions.
If you want to know why movies suck so hard look no further than to the god awful writers they hire nowadays. Because every schmuck thinks they can write, producers must be hiring their barely literate friends to pen scripts. Look up the writers for such recent non blockbusters as Charlie St Cloud, Salt (albeit that one's a hit due to Jolie's star), Dinner For Schmucks or Cats and Dogs 2 (really?) as compared to say Inception, Grown Ups or Toy Story 3. The ones with the established writers did well regardless of reviews, the ones with hacks, except Salt, have all done poorly. Is it too much to ask that you hire people who know what they are doing and aren't related to the executive producer or director. And lets face facts: Zac Ephron is not a movie star, I don't care how pretty he is. HE CAN'T ACT! Staring blankly at the screen does not convey emotion.
In a shockingly offensive move, NBC has greenlit the new "comedy" Outsourced about a guy transferred to India to oversee all the jobs lost from America. Hold on a sec. Laughing too hard to type. Oh sorry it was actually a conniption fit I was having. This is funny to you? Maybe we should set a sitcom in a concentration camp. Oops they did and it was pretty good actually (Hogan's Hero's). But that was done decades after the war. Had this been tried in say 1943, I don't think it would have been as popular. This latest attempt at humor is doomed to fail as unemployed people watch others steal their jobs to a faraway land. Brilliant. And how many people do you know who actually like talking to people in India when they call customer service? Very few I would guess. When I do my best and worst of Fall TV next month, this crap will be at the top of the naughty list.
But the real winner this week is the producers of American Idol who have decided they don't actually want or need viewers for the next season. With everyone but Randy Jackson jettisoned, we are now left with new judge, uber bitch Jennifer Lopez, whose personal career has been in a nose dive for years. Her last album did so poorly her record label dropped her. Mind you this untalented singer recorded one of the worst songs ever. EVER. We call it the car alarm song because it has all the rhythm of a highly annoying noise. Unlistenable, AKA Yoko Onoish. Her acting career has similarly suffered, although she is a better actress than singer whose early roles in Out Of Sight, U Turn and the Cell showed promise, she's spent the last decade making the same mediocre rom-com movies over and over. As a judge I couldn't care less what she has to say and the message boards are less than hospitable to her arrival. Steven Tyler has been the rumored other judge, perhaps taking over for the loopy Paula in a new drug induced haze. "I JUST SHOT HEROIN INTO MY EYEBALLS. WWWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA." Points to anyone who gets that reference. Idol is dead and their producers are the Douchebags of the week.