Sunday, May 11, 2014

DOUCHEBAG OF THE WEEK: THE SULTAN OF BRUNEI

When are people going to get it in their tiny little brains that being racist or homophobic is no longer acceptable? The Sultan of Brunei managed to piss everyone off by instigating Sharia law in his country, the size of Rhode Island, while living the high life in his monstrous palace in blatant disregard for the Koran he says to profess his allegiance to . The result has been disastrous. Let's see those runner ups.


1)Roy Moore- Speaking of religious dicknoses, comes this judge from Alabama who says that the only religion that should get first amendment protection is Christianity because: "They don't want to do that, because that acknowledges the creator God," he said. "Buddha didn't create us. Muhammad didn't create us. It's the God of the Holy Scriptures." Nevermind the fact that the Founding Fathers specifically did NOT want a single religion in charge of government, as they had seen first hand how badly that goes. We still see that to this day in places like Brunei and Saudi Arabia, while simultaneously demanding that same level of oppression here. What an ass and he's a judge? Someone needs to open a history book rather than jerking off to the Bible every Sunday.

2)Nigeria- How bad do you have to run a country when hundreds of teen girls get kidnapped and your response is "Meh. What are you going do?" I don't know, fight them maybe. Destroy their way of life perhaps. Ignoring the problem, as well as lying about it to reporters (which the less stable of the Internet have immediately started calling a conspiracy theory and not the reality that governments lie to the press on a daily basis everywhere on Earth), had made the problem worse. There have been political reason for not labeling Boko Harum, whose last album I loved by the way, a terrorist group, but this goes beyond reason at this point. Can we please start stamping out these morons the same way we did with the Nazis and Communists?


3)Eric Holder- If the right really wants to win some points beyond another round of nonsense concerning Benghazi, the IRS or Birthgate (which is still alive in places), and focus on Impeachment hearing s upon this absolute waste of space and the worst AG in the history of the country. That right numnuts has now officially outpaced, Gonzales, Ashcroft and Reno for the top spot and that is some ominous contestants. This week, Holder held out the possibility that some large banks might actually be facing criminal charges for fucking up the planet, but then at the last minute did his usual song and dance and only went after two foreign banks that had nothing to do with anything that actually happened in 2008. Meanwhile, HSBC continues to allegedly funnel drug money for which they once paid a paltry sum while the rest of the populace, had they been found guilty, would have served a life sentence for doing the same thing. And supposedly, according to some unnamed whistleblower's, are still at it. Banks are also doing all the same crap, like risky credit default swaps, that swamped the system the first time. What could possibly go wrong? Holder is proof of an oligarchy and unless we start demanding more, we are going to get less and less until there is nothing left.

4)Fox News- Fox news got caught red handed demonstrating a racist attitude when there was really no good reason to. In covering the story about the Korean ferry sinking, they showed several sad Asians people. Now, I am better than most at knowing what Asian group looks like what due to my college degree and my Japanese girlfriend, but this photo was just sad. In it, were two obvious Tibetans, who in no way, shape or form look Korean. I could forgive them if they showed two Japanese people instead as those two cultures are hard to differentiate, but this was a come on moment. It was the same when Malaysian authorities said one of the two people with stolen passports looked black when in reality, he was Iranian. How color blind are people? All races do NOT look alike.


5)V. Stiviano- The half black/half Mexican (and truly stunning) mistress of Don Sterling took to the airwaves this week, finally shedding her Daft Punk helmet wore for unknown reasons. It's a good thing she's pretty, because, as the interview showed, she's not very bright. Cunning and conniving, yes, but intelligent, aw hell no! She seemed to have problem speaking in complete sentences, denied having a sexual affair with Stiviano, which flies in the face of reason as billionaires are not the habit of doling out millions on women who won't put out, and came across as spacy and daft. Enjoy your looks now baby, because in a few years, those will be gone and you will have nothing but you intellect. Good luck with that.

6)Obama and Walmart- Obama did a photo op in front of Walmart to praise them for some minor environmental stunt, while ignoring the fact that they pay sub-normal wages which then get subsidized by the taxpayers. What a buffoon. This dick is an anchor around candidates running for a democrat seat, some of whom are quite good, but because President Business (who the right still attacks as a socialist, commie and wrongfully so) doesn't want to upset the apple cart and, I don't know, fix the fucking country, things are going south fast. Can we please elect a President next time (not Hillary or anyone on the right so far) that might actually improve out lives and not the one percenters?


7)Republicans- If I hear the word Benghazi one more time I am going to spit up blood. There is nothing there, there was never anything there and this is not only beating a dead horse, it's grinding the bones for soup. Benghazi happened. It's over. Why didn't anyone attack Bush for the same intelligence failure that led to 9/11? He knew before hand, as another Rice handed him a documents saying Al Qaeda was planning an attack using planes, yet not one Republican demanded answers for that and around 3000 people died in the worst terror attack in US History. This is pure partisan nonsense and anyone still believing there is anything here is thicker than Chris Christie's waist line.

8)Women buying fake pregnancy tests- Guys everywhere should be warned that women are buying positive pregnancy tests over the Internet to trick their men into what ever these women want be it money, marriage or commitment. This is fraud pure and simple. Be warned.

9)VA Hospitals- It came to light this week that the VA Hospitals are cooking their books to appear to be better than they are. The reason for this is the GOP blocked 2 billion in additional costs a few years back because they felt the democrats were making a mountain out of molehill as they suggested the VA hospitals were just fine as is. Oops. If Republicans really want to help, they should get off their fat asses and approve food stamp increase as a new survey says that 25% of veterans go hungry every day and because of their denial of Medicare expansion, over 100,000 have died, some of whom are vets as well. So much for them supporting the troops, huh?


10) Sultan of Brunei- This ass is one of the richest people on the planet and recently declared his tiny, but oil rich nation, an Islamic State that will now prosecute Homosexuals with the death penalty as well as treating all women as second class citizens. The fury was immediate and the two LA hotels he owns, the Bel Air and Beverly Hills Hotel, the occupancy rate has dropped. A LA hotspot at the later, which is the number 2 restaurant in the area, the Polo Lounge, is abandoned. A week ago, getting a table on a Saturday night would be as easy as me getting a date with Kate Upton, or not going to happen in my lifetime. This Saturday, I could have brought a party of twenty and walked right in. Dozens of charity events, bridal showers and weddings have been called off, costing the hotel millions in lost revenue and it hasn't been a week yet. Maybe he'll get the message, but I doubt it. Either way, his hotel empire is crumbling. So congratulations Sultan of Brunei you are indeed douchebag of the week.

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