Had to give a rare tie to two forces who seem hell bent on ending all life on the planet. Will Putin start a nuclear war in his unadvised return to Cold War politics or will Isis make life unbearable for every single Muslim on Earth with their extremists positions? Only time will tell but we seem to be headed for a cliff from which survival seems unlikely. Let's see those runner ups.
1)Chris Christie and Pension Reform- Chris Christie is a bloated tick who lies more than just about any politician alive and yes, that includes Obama, who if was he was Pinocchio would have a nose that circled the Earth. Many see him as a straight talker but that's only for the MSM and morons who get all the news from right wing loons. Everything is somebody else's fault for Christie, ala the bridge scandal, and things like unions and pensions are bankrupting the country. Actually, the thing bankrupting the country are greedy Wall St. douchebags getting fifty cents off the dollar on all pension plans nationwide. Then, when they start to fail, it's the fault of regular people demanding a real pension and not rich losers stealing from us blind. With this guy it is constantly not his fault, but the greedy (insert group here) unions, teachers, public officials, or whatever makes right wingers get a hard on. The funny part is the whole pension crisis was caused by the Republicans under Whitman when she borrowed from a then surplus and never paid it back, just like Social Security which we keep being told is going broke for the same reason. The government is stealing from you and corporations are all for it as they are the ones making a mint off it. Keep voting for Republicans douchebags and see how far we fall next year.
2)Ultra-liberals- I hate liberals sometimes as much as the far right. This week, mostly liberal women who must have some sort of genetic need to complain, faulted the late Robin Williams for a bit from the eighties that pocked fun at Islam and Iran. In it, Williams grabbed a scarf, put it around his head like a hijab, and said "Welcome to Iran. Help me." Women, and a few men, screeched about racism, not realizing that this was actually sacrilegious as this was about religion not race. Morons. Iran is not our friend (the government, not the people) and Islam is definitely not a Western ally. Can we please stop having this false outrage over EVERYTHING? There are real things to bitch about, the economy, the environment, the Republican party to name a few, so can we stop already with this nonsense? Then we had the same group attack Liz Warren for her reasonable stance that Israel is allowed to defend themselves when she authorized funding for the obviously needed Iron Dome system. Some on the left screamed bloody murder about this, not realizing that war is sometimes inevitable and people, including children, die every day because of it. Funny how these same lunatics kept quiet during the last few Gulf Wars which killed millions of children between bombs, bullets and sanctions.
3)Black Racists- This week, a group of black racists beat Ralph Weems nearly to death in the parking lot of a Waffle House in Mississippi for the crime of being white. Even more surprising, police are NOT treating this as a hate crime, even though it fits every definition of what happened. Why are black people allowed to be racist against white people with zero repercussions, but if a white guy says something innocuous like "pot calling the kettle black," it's racist and that person should be vilified? There is WAY too much racism right now in the black community, a fact echoed by my black friends who live in some terrible neighborhoods. Fact is, this is turning a lot of white people more and more racist. So keep it up black people if you want to see what real racism looks like as there are a lot more of us than there are of you.
4) Christine Lagarde- The head of the IMF is in trouble as she is being investigated for fraud and corruption charges. Why are the French so often embroiled in charges of corruption? The IMF has backed her against the charges but I wonder if she not actually guilty considering her awful tenure so far. She has acknowledged that her plans to save the EU has not worked and that austerity measures have done little good. In response to this momentary spark of reason, she then chose to do absolutely nothing on response. Stunning. She is now caught up in the same scandal that has gotten former President Sarkozy which involves some sort of pay or play deal worth almost 300 million euros. Is there no one on Earth we can trust anymore?
5)Arizona Gun Laws- This week, a nine year old girl shot her gun instructor in the head when the Uzi she was firing rocketed back in her hands, shooting her instructor in the head. This is the exact same circumstances that took place here in MA in 2008 when a boy firing an Uzi shot himself in the face. And while the nine year old, who will be facing years of therapy, has zero blame in this, the parents from NJ do and especially the gun range that allows a nine year old to fire such a powerful weapon that has proven fatal in the not too distant past. Gun experts say the instructor did everything wrong from where he stood, to the amount of bullets in the gun. And he's the expert? I am all for letting people own whatever guns they want but no one under the age of sixteen should be using these types of weapons. Period.
6)Zara's- In a bit so mind bogglingly stupid, you have to wonder if IQ's are not dwindling rapidly world wide. These ass clowns said to themselves, "You know what be great fun. Concentration Camp chic." So these brainpowers went and designed said shirt with stripes and a huge star of David on it and actually put it in their stores. Guess what group had a giant conniption with this and rightfully so? The shirts were pulled quick but way to damage your rep Zara's.
7)Will Hayden- The star of the now cancelled Sons of Guns was arrested this week for repeatedly raping an 11 year old girl. What a douche. Anyone who rapes a child deserves the hell they are going to get because one thing I know about prison from some of the people I know still there, is that they LOVE child molesters in jail. Prisoners cannot wait to explain to these lowlifes how much they hate what they have done. Criminals may be evil but even they toe the line when it comes to kids and animals. On a quick side note, some idiot reporter said a Sons of Anarchy star had been arrested, instead of Sons of Guns so way to fact check douche.
8)Death- Will someone please tell the Grim Reaper to lay off funny comics and go after some of the less talented. We just got over the death of Robin Williams and now it looks like the supremely funny Joan Rivers may join him. I am not into fashion and still watch her Fashion Police show to see what quips she had for the week. At 81, she was still sharp as a tack. But now she in a coma and things look bleak. I wish her only the best and hope Death will go after Tom Green, Pauly Shore or some other unfunny douchewad instead.
9)Burger King and Warren Buffet- Had the world not been set to flame broil, these two would have been my douchebag of the week. Burger King unwisely has decided to move their HQ to Canada in what appears to be a blatant tax dodge. Warren Buffet put up $3 billion for the move, proving that their are no good billionaires out there and the whole group should be tarred and feathered for this nonsense. Walgreens faced such a backlash they stopped their inversion tactics. Fate will see if BK will follow suit, or if boycotts doom the franchise. I know I have eaten my last Whopper.
10)Isis/Putin- Who will end the world first? Will it be Isis by doing an act of terror so heinous that the rest of the world commits genocide against all Muslims? Or will Putin start a nuclear war by invading Ukraine? It's a toss up. Isis has gone so far to say they are targeting the Pope, which would be the start of another World War, just like when Gavic Princip killed Archduke Ferdinand and set the stage for hundreds of millions of deaths world wide for the next forty years. One man set the world ablaze in 1914. It could happen again if Pope Francis gets assassinated by one lone nut bag. Or Isis could set up bubonic plague bombs as one recovered laptop of theirs suggested. There is supposedly a lot of chatter about an upcoming attack either in London or on our Southern Border. Either way, Muslims will become the new Japanese of the late 1930's and we all know what happened to them. And then there is Putin who bravado is reaching dangerous territory. He repeatedly reminds people Russia has nukes, apparently oblivious to the fact that the rest of the world does too. The EU has given Russia one week to pull out of Ukraine or face more sanctions. Considering all 28 countries have to agree on this, that threat may be unlikely but you never know. Either way, Putin is putting the world at risk for old school land conquests. So congratulations Isis and Putin you are both douchebags of the week.