Sunday, July 1, 2012

DOUCEHBAG OF THE WEEK: MOTHER NATURE

 
It has been hot as hell here in MA for the past few days but it is nothing compared to the rest of the country that have been sweltering in triple digit heat and drowning in over two feet of rain. Let’s see those runner ups.

1)The Pax Centurion- For those unfamiliar with this rag, it is completely understandable as it only goes out to Boston’s “finest” boys in blue. In a column this week, the editor of the newspaper wrote that the OWS movement was mostly a bunch of ignorant kids and their idiot parents. Officer James W. Carnell, a veteran of the Boston police force and the managing editor wrote the scathing article in response to another article written by a renowned college professor. In it he calls the OWS movement a plague and everything that is wrong the country. WTF? Maybe you missed the part in our Constitution that allows this basic right but from the state of the article you wrote, I am guessing you can barely read. In an earlier article, Carnell said protestors demonstrating against the corporate greed mentality of Wall Street were “deranged rich kids and aging hippies who led stupid marches downtown, took drugs and engaged in sex with dumb college girls who offered themselves willingly to the poor.”





Needless to say, this did not go over well with anyone. When people complained and said Boston PD agreed with them, this was his response:

“You say you ‘spoke with officers and got a lot of support’?” asks Carnell. “Bil, let me let you in on a trade secret: they were bullshitting you. They were laughing at you while pretending to agree with your stupid group and the assembled morons from privileged backgrounds who took over public property and destroyed it.”

Elsewhere in the issue, Carnell writes that he encourages Lewis to “organize a community meeting, bang some bongo drums and invite me as your guest speaker. I’ll bring the tofu and brown rice. You start the line-dancing with the grey haired Jamaica Plain and Cambridge aging hippies.”

“Most police officers have to remain quiet because of our positions, but I have the luxury of speaking on behalf of what 99 percent of police officers really think about you and your occupies,” he adds. “Why don’t you and your fellow occupiers go find a sandbox . . . where you can protest injustices, stamp your feet, scream and yell and then go home to Mommy and Daddy and eat quiche, brie and have a good long slug of Chardonnay?”

As for the professor who wrote in response to his idiotic tirade, who has in the past served as a computer scientist at Sun Microsystems and has also taught at acclaimed institutions such as Tufts University, MIT and Stanford, this was his reponse:

“I noticed that you identified yourself as a teacher,” writes Carnell. “Aha! No wonder this country is filled with so many young idiots who don’t know history, geography, math or classical literature, but can sing North Korean-style songs praising Obama!”

“Perhaps, Bil, if you spent less time at Occupy Boston and more time instructing students in how to think critically, we might actually have students who can find Europe on a map? Then again, too many liberals like yourself indoctrinate students, rather than teach matters of substance. Liberals act on emotion and feelings, conservatives use logic and support.”

This ass needs to fired and quick. I am sick to death of hearing how “liberals” are destroying society when it’s fuckwads like this dick that are in actuality doing just that. I hope you take a bullet from some likeminded conservative who is armed to the teeth and intensely dislikes you during a routine traffic stop. This is the “peer group” you are so eloquently writing to.

As a result, many an advertiser has pulled out of the newspaper, the Mayor has been deluged with angry letters and Elizabeth Warren has been given yet another sound bite against the GOP. Keep it up, idiots and watch Republicans lose big come November.

2)Rick Scott, Bobby Jendel and Chris Christie- These three stooges, with Christie born to play the part of Curley, have all vowed to ignore the federal government’s new Obamacare law now that the Supreme Court has ruled it as a legitimate law. These are the same three that routinely go along with the feds on stuff they like while simultaneously, ignoring any law they don’t. Organized gambling is fine but don’t let any of that legalized demon weed in my state all three have said. You don’t get to pick and choose which laws you like and those you don’t. If you do, so should we and the first thing we going to do is decriminalize drugs, allow legal prostitution and allow the death penalty for any politician ever caught stealing from the people. That will save us a huge mess come November. Will people in these states grow a brain and get rid of these morons already.






3) Republicans- With the upheld Obamacare law, the GOP went into overdrive this week crying about how this law would end America as we know it and led us toward a fascist state. Bad news guys, we are already there and you have led the charge. The funny thing is, other than the individual mandate, the rest of the policy is filled with stuff people like. However, the individual mandate is how we pay for the whole thing so that part cannot go away. What is needed is a single payer plan which is what we should have gotten in the first place and something the democrats need to option after the election if they win. The GOP is caught between a rock and a hard place as people overwhelmingly like the law, don’t understand the mandate part and why it’s necessary, and have a candidate who fought hard for both in MA and actually implemented it. How do you fight against something you created? And for the umpteenth time, it does not take 55 days to see your GP anywhere in this state. I don’t know where that lie came from but as someone who has to see a doctor on a regular basis, the longest I have ever had to wait is one week, and that was because he was on vacation. Plus, health care costs have gone down, premiums are not rising anywhere near places like CA or CT and doctor shortages are no worse than anywhere else. The Obamacare plan can work if subsidized health care is allowed for people who can’t afford insurance, like me. Do that, and watch the GOP crumble as it will be a very popular law. Thank assmunch Joe Liberman for killing that part when first announced.



4)Fukushima- Rumors have been spreading that temperatures in reactor 4 are rising and a possible containment collapse may now occur. If it does, radiation will spread across the globe, possibly making the entire Northern Hemisphere unlivable. On the plus side, we will have no problem finding food in the dark as it will all glow for us. If the temperatures keep climbing at the rate they have mentioned, it will reach unsafe levels as of Tuesday.


5)Wall Street- Having watched the stock market yo-yo wildly this week I have come to the conclusion that no one on Wall Street has any idea what is going on anymore. The smallest tick of good or bad news sends the Dow soaring or crashing depending on the information coming out of Europe. Here’s what they are not getting: the Euro is doomed. As long as austerity measures are used to break the economy, the Euro will slide further and further into oblivion. The stock market had a huge upswing this week when new lending practices were discussed, even though they have no hope of working. There are these things called history books gentlemen that actually discuss past Depressions and what not to do, a blueprint the Europeans are following to a T if they want a general collapse. Don’t be fooled by the Dow. Sooner, rather than later, the whole system is going to crash and look out below when it does because the whole economy is going to go with it.


6)Nat GEO’s Chasing UFO’s- I admit I like watch ghost shows mainly because they alternate between showing interesting footage that even I can’t explain to mundane “orbs” and obvious trickery. Other shows attempting this format, like the laughable Finding Bigfoot, are pretty terrible. But the worst has always been UFO shows. History channel did an admirable job with their UFO Hunters, but it was still a dull show. Sy-Fy’s same named show lasted one episode before being yanked as it was unwatchable. The problem with these type of shows is that UFO’s are hard to film and do not appear in the same place with any regularity, if they even do exist. I did catch a spectacular video of a UFO on Fact or Faked a few weeks back that I still have no idea what it was. It was a glowing green light that only appeared on infrared and then shot up into the sky without warning. Most shows are like this one though: boring witnesses, terrible video and shitty production values. A must miss.

7) Mother Nature- This week brought massive flooding to Florida, sweltering heat across the country and power outages throughout the DC area. My poor sister is one of those affected and is going to head to my Aunt’s cabin on the Jersey Shore which still has electricity. I was there a few weeks ago and just missed one of the drunken louts on that idiotic show getting arrested for standing in traffic and swatting cars. Too bad as it would have been a great video to sell to the tabloids. Kansas saw record heat of 118 degrees, Florida saw upwards of two feet of rain and DC had ninety mile an hour winds in a super storm called a derecho. Somebody seems pissed. So congratulation Mother Nature you are indeed douchebag of the week.

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