DOUCHEBAG OF THE YEAR: REPUBLICANS

No group on Earth was as destructive to everyone, including themselves, as the Republican party and those that voted for them. It was a year of many, many douchebags. Let' s see those runner ups.

1)Piers Morgan-His anti gun tirades got old quick as he espoused total disarmament and ignored facts from his own government that once England did just that, violent crime tripled. Here in America, the more guns allowed, the less crime recorded. This is simple math at this point. Guns save lives. Getting rid of guns doesn't.

2)Diane Fienstein- Walking right into the crosshairs of the NRA and a gun loving public, this ultra-liberal overreached and proposed a bill that would ban most types of guns, including shotguns and handguns. Not only is this bill dead on arrival, as the House has ZERO chance of passing it, it has resulted in a massive blow out in gun sales, adding ten million new guns into a saturated market. Way to go, lady. If you wanted even more guns out there, you succeeded beyond your wildest dreams.

3)NRA-Being the polar opposite of Fienstein, the NRA blew a chance for a realistic look at gun laws that even the most die hard gun owner supports like eliminating the gun show loophole for background checks. There was no mention of  ending the drug war or putting away mental morons who should have been locked up years ago, and instead gave us an unrealistic attitude of putting armed guards in every school, which is not possible due to budgetary issues. They went on to further say that Hollywood is to blame, a totally bullshit factoid. We will never have any sensible progress as long as both sides are going to unlimited extremes that have no chance of success.

4)Lindsay Lohan- This was year that Lindsay finally crashed and burned. She was arrested multiple times, violated parole, and is almost certainly going back to jail again. While all this was occurring she starred in one of the worst TV programs of 2012, Liz and Dick, had her assets seized by the IRS for lack of payment and was docked ten grand from the producers of Scary Movie 5 (which looks just awful) for trashing her trailer. 2013 will not be any kinder to this fading star.

5)Patricia Krentical- The only human on Earth more orange than John Boehner, the Tan Mom was arrested earlier this year for bringing her five year old daughter to a tanning salon. She turned this horrific moment into a public spectacle of showing up drunk at a NYC drag show, where she was booted for public intoxication. She has added she would love to do Playboy which wisely has turned her down as they only showcase humans within their pages.

6)Jerry Sandusky- This dick used his charity to molest little boys and had the whole thing covered up by executives and Joe Paterno at Penn State. He is currently serving a life sentence where he will hopefully experience everything he did to those poor innocent kinds. Bottoms up, Sandusky.

7)Chris Brown- Whoever is buying anything from this waste of space I have one suggestion: kill yourself. You are as bad as this woman beating, neck tattooed of a bloody Rhianna, awful musician asshole. He is currently being sued for $16 million for a bar brawl. I hope he loses everything.

8)Lance Armstrong- Without a doubt, the biggest douche athlete of the decade. Lance denied doping for years until the whole house of cards came crashing down as it turns out he lied all these years. As a result, he lost all his Tour De France titles, his Olympic medals and any reputation he once had. He was dropped by every sponsor in spitting distance and was even forced to step down from his own charity. The only saving grace was at least he wasn't molesting little boys too.

9)Francesco Scnettino- This Costa  cruise line captain who abandoned ship long before the passengers even knew the ship was sinking was a true douchebag. He endangered everyone by sailing way too close to shore to impresses a pretty girl on the bridge, hit a reef and fled to shore before anyone else. He ignored repeated attempts by the authorities to return to the ship and was arrested soon afterward, responsible for the deaths that occurred. Hope you like Italian prison, ass.

10)Roger Godell- The current NFL commissioner, fresh off the NFL lockout from last year, decided to rinse and repeat by locking out the refs and replacing them with scabs whose past included coaching pee wee football and high school, and who, I think, were actually blind people. They were so bad, it became a laughing stock and people started not watching anymore and players were refusing to play. The owners and Godell had to cave to all the demands the refs had, as they all the power. The GOP should take a play from this outcome as they face similar repercussions.

11)The Koch Brothers- These double douches spent hundreds of millions of dollars and got zilch for their efforts except for a lighter wallet. Almost every person they supported lost in the national election. If they were also behind the Innocence of Muslims movie that set the world aflame, they blew that as well.

12)Radical Muslims- If you want to make a religion look bad, these radicals succeeded amazingly well. The made themselves look like reactionary monkeys for attacking embassies over an awful film, attacked and killed an ambassador in Benghazi just because, attempted several attacks that fizzled before they even began and made the whole religion look stupid as a result. People who don't understand religion, any religion, which is pretty much everyone from what I can tell, are forced to look like retarded fools who laugh at science, facts and progress.

13)Radical Christians- These idiots weren't much better when you have morons like Fred Phelps protesting outside of funerals because, according to him, God hates fags. Or take Harold Camping who predicted the end of the world three times and was wrong every time. These are the same Tea Party fuckwads who don't believe in evolution, the Big Bang and other proven scientific principles. At this point and time, that is just sad.

14)The Tea Party- They got their asses handed to them in the 2012 election cycle as many decided to use their brains and vote these asses out of office. Allen West, who epitomises the word Uncle Tom, threw a temper tantrum when he lost his recent seat as his stupidity became an obstacle to logic and reason. There are still enough of these regressive morons though to still fuck up the country for the rest of us.

15)John Schnatter-Nobody suffered more as CEO than this dick who cried poverty about Obamacare, threatened to lower hours and wages for his employees and watched his brand fall off the Earth as a result. He apologized, sort of, later but the damage to his shitty pizza was too much and his profits have sunk accordingly. Nobody should be buying anything from this man ever again, especially his terrible food.

16)Donald Trump- The NYC billionaire lost a lot of credibility when he announced earth shattering news about Obama and then made a weak pitch about him releasing his college records. For a PT Barnum type of the 21st century, he got squashed by an elephant. The birther crap sure didn't help. He was also recently outed on the website The Smoking Gun as being the least charitable billionaire in America, giving a paltry $3.7 million to his own Trump foundation over the last 20 years and a additional three million to others. What a dick.

17)Joe Apraio- Another in a long line of birther garbage, Joe held a press conference, like Trump's, shouting about facts uncovered about Obama's supposed forged birth certificate. Then the stuff he trotted out was all the same discredited crap we already knew about. Obama was born in Hawaii. Deal with it.

18)Angus T Jones- Making Charlie Sheen look like the sane one takes some work, but the actor from Two and a Half Men did just that by trashing his own show on a viral video. Apparently, fuckwad has joined some religious cult where we find that not only is he a raving loon but a virgin who has never drank alcohol as well. If you are 19, rich, famous and a virgin that isn't a virtue but a cry for help. Somebody have sex with this idiot stat.

19)The Kardashians- Kim is smoking hot but the other two, especially Moose in training Khloe, need to go away. X Factor was unwatchable before, but the addition of her as co-host blew up in the producers' faces as it turns out, not only is she a giant, she has no stage presence either. I have had enough of them whenever they talk. Kim should get into porn or something more dignified than what she does now.

20)Amanda Byrnes- Channeling Lindsay Lohan, this "star" had a full on meltdown this year where she was involved in multiple car accidents and locking herself into store bathrooms for hours on end. As I have never seen her in anything, I won't exactly miss her.

21)The name Sandy- Yes anyone with the name Sandy got dirty looks after being associated with one of the worst hurricanes ever to the hit the east coast and a school massacre where 20 children were killed by a psycho. I think Helen is a nice name, don't you?

22)Mental patients walking the street/ACLU- Thanks to the ACLU, state hospitals were shut down and way too stringent laws for committing people blew up in our faces as sick individuals shot many, many people, including a Congresswoman, and little kids. This week another man was pushed in front of a train in NYC by a disturbed woman and a nutbag set his house on fire and shot the firefighters who arrived to put it out. When are we going to have this discussion, instead of blaming guns and video games?

23)Gina Reinhart- Once described by her own father as a "devious baby elephant," this Australian billionaire and tub of goo came across as a greedy pig and looked the part all at the same time. She chided workers for being lazy for wanting a livable wage, said in the media she wished she could pay everyone pennies on the dollar for their work and has now bought out Fairfax Media making her Australia's new Rupert Murdock. Shameful.

24)Rupert Murdock/Fox News- They got their asses handed to them this year when a hacking scandal destroyed Rupert's reputation and Fox News became the laughing stock of the world. Rupert's hacking scheme against a murder victim was the final straw and cost him the paper News of the World and his last shreds of dignity, along with most of his editorial staff including his own children. Fox has become so hyper-partisan that no one is paying attention to any news they break, no matter how damning. If Benghazi hadn't been so overhyped with nonsense reporting, the Obama administration might have had a harder time with his re-election. But instead, everyone ignored it as it came from Fox, especially on the world news scene. Karl Rove's meltdown on election night, along with Dick Morris' hysterically bad prediction of the outcome, led to both being banished from the air waves. Let's hope they stay that way.

25)TSA-Another year, another rash of thefts, pedophiles and power mad agents. The TSA keeps stalling on testing the new back scatter machines that some say is destroying us at a DNA level. And a new report from a ex-TSA agent say the naked pictures are being oogled and laughed at behind closed doors. The new Gestapo in action.

26-The police- Speaking of Gestapo, there have been a flood of stories of aggressive police shooting dogs and people for no apparent reason. The right to film them has been protected on almost every state level, yet they still think they are above the law and go through extreme, albeit illegal, actions to stop those that are. If the Obama administration goes through with their threat to remove guns and the police are charged to forcefully get them, I leave them with the words of Colonel Trautman and the movie Rambo, "Anything else we should bring? A good supply of body bags."

27)Anti gun worshippers- Stats show more guns equal less crime, as John Lott's book of the same title shows. Weird eyebrows aside and some suspect data, particularly about background checks, a lot of his research IS accurate. This is a common disinformation strategy where you find one thing that is false and throw out the rest of the data because of it, even if it is right. States with more guns have less crime than those that have strict gun control. Look at the data for NYC, Washington DC or Chicago versus El Paso, Dallas or Phoenix. While it is true there are many more gun deaths in the South overall than the Northeast, this may have more to do with education and upbringing than guns themselves. Guns save lives but the media only focuses on when someone dies in the old, "If it bleed, it leads," motto still alive today.

28)The MSM- What a bunch of buffoons these guys have been this year. They missed major stories, like always, and those that have been reading this blog have found out info hours, days, even weeks before they got involved, if at all. We have consolidated our news from fifty outlets thirty years ago to six. It has had a chilling effect on the information we get. There is no good news anymore except through the web. Just remember the words of Lou Reed: "Don't believe half of what you see and none of what you hear." The media is lying to you on a regular basis. This is not hyperbole but fact. And if you don't believe me, good. Look it up for yourself and see the truth for yourself..

29)Jamie Dimon-CEO of JP Morgan, he lost $2 billion in derivative losses. Wait make that $4 billion. No, no it was $9 billion after all. We never did find out exactly how much he lost gambling the companies money away, yet he still has his job. Obama is supposedly eyeing him for Treasury Secretary. That's just incredible.

30)HSBC- The government fined them a paltry $1.92 billion for crimes that anyone else would have faced forfeiture laws and the death penalty for. After getting caught red handed dealing with terrorists and rouge states, they got a slap on the wrist and no arrests for anyone. If anyone needed a clearer sign that there are two sets of laws in this country, one for the rich and the rest for the poor, this is it.

31)Syria- Assad is killing his own people and the world watches, unsure what to do. Do we topple a dictator and watch the country decend into madness, aka Egypt, or arm the rebels and face the consequences later? There are no good answers here.

32)Egypt- Morsi ran the good tidings for ending the over too quickly Gaza war and then went power mad making himself a dictator in his own right in Egypt. Violent protests followed and he was forced to back down slightly. This is not a good sign of things to come.

33)North Korea- Supposedly, the rouge state is gearing up for a nuke test. What could possibly go wrong with that? Kim Jung Un, so far, seems a chip off the old block which is not not good news for anyone.

34)Iran- Ignoring the world, this rouge nation is hell bent to get a nuke, all the while claiming peaceful purposes for their nuclear program, nevermind the fact the country is flooded with oil. This will come to a head soon, most likely this spring. Good luck on that world.

35)Republicans- Yes it was a banner year for the GOP giving us such treats as Michelle Bachmann, Herman Cain, Rick Santorum, Mitch McConnel, John Boehner, Eric Cantor, John McCain, Newt Gingrich, Todd Akin, Richard Mourdock, Allen West, Joe Walsh, Paul Ryan and of course, Mitt Romney, a man so stiff he made Al Gore look like Snoop Dog, oops I mean Snoop Lion (roll eyes here please). Yes all those snide comments made about women, immigrants (especially Mexicans), gay people, the young, the old, veterans, etc. really added up to a solid defeat on election day. When you piss off the entire nation, other than those that weren't white, stupid and religious, votes are hard to come by. And you guys got thumped in November. First, you made up your own stats, and then, actually believed them. Then, you made statement after statement that made you unelectable. 47% anyone? Abortion is God's will? Social Security is a Ponzi scheme?That was some hard core stupidity. The chances of you winning any national election is zero at this rate. And what have you done to fix this abomination of a party? Nothing. The fiscal cliff looms and we are headed over because tax hikes on the rich are beyond your ability to care about. If I hear one more douchebag say $90 billion a year in new tax revenue is not enough should hang himself with his own tongue. No it won't solve everything, but when you add it with other programs being cut, like the bloated military and other common sense ideas (Like actually taxing companies and raising capital gain taxes), we could be prosperous again. Fixing SS and Medicare are far easier than they are making it out to be because rich people are going to get hit the hardest, which is fine as they haven't been touched the last four years while the rest of us have been bent over the sink and ass fucked with a spiked dildo. The rich have made money, and lots of it, while the rest of us are being told to eat cake. A report from the IMF recently said that what Iceland did (fire the government and arrest everyone involved) worked far better than austerity measures which is odd because all they had to do was open a history book for that tidbit. Austerity NEVER works, yet the GOP is screaming for it here. Fuck them. Fuck anyone who votes for these idiots and Fuck Mitt Romney for running the worst campaign I have ever seen. So congratulations Republicans, all Republicans, for you are indeed Douchebag of the Year.