Sunday, March 10, 2013

DOUCHEBAG OF THE WEEK: NORTH KOREA

Proving my point that irrational people with nuclear arms is a really bad idea, Kim Jung Un threw a king sized temper tantrum this week and double dog dared the US and South Korea to do anything about it. Ugh! Let's see those runner ups of which they are way too many.

1)People who watch mass media with the sole purpose of bitching about it-  In previous months we have had Muslims complaining about images of Muhammad being aired, the poorly named One Million Moms (short approximately one million moms) complaining about just about everything on TV and now this week, another religious, ie fascist, group, claimed victory over the terrible things we are seeing over the airwaves.

The AFA (American Family Association) claimed victory over SNL and that they had managed to get Sears and JC Penny to dump their ads from this "heinous" show, especially after the very funny fake movie ad "Quentin Tarantino's Djesus Uncrossed." Problems is, apparently for all their hoopla, it wasn't true. Both companies issued statements that their ads would still be aired (and did last night by the way) and only would not appear on the Hulu on line version during that sketch only. The AFA seems to miss the fact that SNL is one of the highest rated show on all of television on the moment and near double the next program on NBC right now. Only a fool would pull their ads from that kind of saturation and neither was indeed that stupid. The AFA on the other hand?

Here's a link to the One Million Mom site: http://onemillionmoms.com/

Tell me that is not what Hitler's site would have looked like, only with more dead Jews. My favorite is them taking credit for the cancellation of 666 Park Avenue. Yeah it was all your effort and not the fact the show was boring. These kinds of things are no better than strict Muslim countries controlling what their people see and hear. Do you really want to live in a place like Saudi Arabia?

2)Holocaust Deniers- This is one of the stupidest conspiracies out there. And new research into German records, which are meticulous by the way as these guys wrote down everything, shows that there were far more people being held prisoner, perhaps as high as 20 million. That is not to say these were all Jews, but undesirables, POW's, and political prisoners as well. The evidence shows more camps, brothels and slave labor areas then previously thought, some small, containing ten people, others much larger containing thousands. There is no cover up. Millions of Jews died. So did millions of others. Move on to something more sophisticated to waste your time with like looking for the Loch Ness Monster or invisible planes during 9/11. This shit happened. Deal with it.

3)Michael Reagan- Proving that the acorn didn't fall far from the tree, this right wing columnist wrote a column so stupid, I almost blacked out while reading it as my eyes tried to protect my brain from was written there. Here's a link to it, but don't say I didn't warn you if the room starts to spin.

http://townhall.com/columnists/michaelreagan/2013/03/07/getting-wise-to-government-lies-n1527366

Here a quote from it:

"(Obama and the democrats)They spent weeks trying to frighten the America people into believing the country would collapse into chaos and suffering if the federal government's sequester-forced spending cuts went into effect."

"In case you haven't noticed by now, Armageddon didn't happen. The sequester came and the sun is still coming up. Planes aren't falling from the heavens. And I haven't had to use my guns to defend my home against a single robber or terrorist"

Maybe he missed every single article about this, but the cuts were spread out over several months and the real pain wouldn't be felt right away. He makes it sound as if the world would stop on a dime the second the sequester went into effect, which nobody said was going to happen.

What a putz. This guy is using false logic to prove a point that nobody expected to occur. It's like finding out you have cancer and expecting to drop dead the next day. That pain will be spread out for some time, just like the sequester. It is exactly for crap like this that we have so many stupid people in the country who read this tripe and believe it.

4)Stupid Criminals- Somedays Karma is your friend. It certainly was for Lakewood, CO waitress, Brianna Priddy. While working at her job at Applebee's, a customer came in and showed her ID to get a drink. Turns out, the license was Priddy's, who stalled the table while the cops arrived. Seems Priddy's purse was stolen the previous week, from where I don't know, but if it was from Applebee's, it would seem dangerously stupid to attempt to use a stolen ID there. The unnamed woman also faces bad check and drug charges. Sometimes, God is really quick with his vengeance.

5)TSA-Back again after a short absence, a former TSA agent told the New York Post that the entire operation is a sham that does less than nothing to protect people. Considering that an undercover agent got through Newark security TWICE with a fake bomb, makes this story all the more interesting. Here is a link:

http://www.nypost.com/p/news/local/confessions_of_tsa_agent_we_re_bunch_OhxHeGd0RR9UVGzfypjnLO

Apparently, most of the retards do not even have a high school diploma which makes a lot of sense. If you want a goon squad, hire real goons. From a separate article, we find that, as I reported here in an earlier column, they are NOT doing security checks on new hires, which is allowing many a criminal to get a job in airport security. If we are trying to make things safer, shouldn't we start with the people we hire first? Due to utter mismanagement, we are wasting billions of dollars each and every year on things that do nothing other than waste money. Where are all the Tea Party morons with this bloated government program? Funny how Medicare, Social Security and Medicaid are the problem and not this shit.

6)Paul Ryan- Speaking of entitlement programs, Ryan released his budget proposals and, for the third straight year, is the exact same thing we have seen already. Draconian cuts to social programs and huge tax breaks for the rich, including yet another try to privatize Medicare. Maybe he slept through the last election, which would be ironic as he was running for VP, but we already decided that that garbage belonged in the can with the rest of the bad ideas they peddled on us. WE DO NOT WANT PRIVATIZED SOCIAL PROGRAMS! Christ, get it through your thick skull already.

7)Republicans- Other than Rand Paul and a handful of others, including bandwagon jumper Mitch McConnell, Republicans took the bullet train to Crazyville with way too many saying or doing something utterly, mindbendingly stupid. Let's start with Ed Orcutt (R-WA) who said this from the National Memo:

Orcutt recently responded to a constituent who opposed a proposed bike tax by claiming that bicycling is not environmentally friendly. His reasoning? “You would be giving off more CO2 if you are riding a bike than driving in a car.”

“Since CO2 is deemed to be a greenhouse gas and a pollutant, bicyclists are actually polluting when they ride,” Orcutt added in an email to the constituent.

As The Raw Story points out, “Virtually all available science on the carbon footprint of driving versus biking says [Orcutt] is dead wrong.” Indeed, the European Cyclists Federation estimates that CO2 emissions from biking are about 10 times less than driving a car, even after accounting for all emissions required to make the bike and the food eaten by the rider.

If you think a person can emit as much carbon as a car, you need to repeat high school.

Ted Gassman (R-IO) boarded the Nutbag Train this week with his proposal, along with seven other retards, that wanted to eliminate no fault divorces as they lead to the possibility of the daughter's becoming sexual promiscuous. WTF? What study is that from? I am being told that there is no such study and this is just delusional ranting from someone who should be hospitalized and not voting on important matters. Even worse, he used his sixteen year old granddaughter as an example. Yikes, that's going to be an awkward Thanksgiving. "Thanks for calling me a whore, Grandpa!" That bill is already dead in the water.

Glenn Beck returns with this gem: That President Obama wants to get rid of all of our guns so he can reintroduce slavery. Yeah the black president wants to enslave people. The ones that would have the most to worry about that would be anyone watching your program. If that's the case, I am all for it.

Pamela Gellar is furious that she wasn't invited to the CPAC dinner that has such brainpowers as Sarah Palin and Rick Perry coming as guest speakers. Who hoo, where do I sign up? Nevermind the fact that Gellar is an avowed racist against Muslims and has actually claimed that the reason she is not invited this year is that CPAC is instituting Sharia Law. Really? The most Conservative group in the country is actually a Muslim front. Wow! You cannot make this stuff up.

And then yet another conservative watchdog group, the hilariously named Accuracy in Media, claims that the Vatican will bow to George Soros and Obama's demands and elect a socialistic, black Pope. Once elected, capitalism will die and socialism will be the new norm. Sounds good to me. Where do I sign up?

8)Climate deniers- This week it snowed two more feet of snow here making it the sixth snowiest winter ever here. Because of this, climate skeptics have jumped all over that fact and declared global warming a hoax. Unfortunately, it is exactly what scientists have predicted would happen as more moisture is in the air, leading to more snow during cold weather. We are breaking more and more heat records every year and less and less cold ones. The most disturbing news came out this week that there is more carbon in the air than has ever been detected before. The result is that keeping the warming to under two degrees by 2100 is not possible. This means there will be severe weather patterns and almost certainly the extinction of millions of species, possible ours as well. Things by 2100 are going to be terrible due to coal plants being fired in developing nations and a lack of understanding world wide about the problems we face here. Deny these facts at your own risk.

9)North Korea- Kim Jung Un has proven to be an unstable leader, threatening for the umpteenth time about ripping up the truce treaty and has supposedly cut the hotline from North to South Korea. They have also threatened the US with a pre-emptive nuke strike which would be the equivalent of throwing a glass of water on a large, mentally imbalanced escaped convict and not expecting to get pummeled into a soft, sludgy substance. These are the kinds of things that even the smallest miscalculations can lead to deadly consequences. The South has shrugged most of this off as the North has cried wolf so many times the threat has no impact any more. People went about their business with the attitude of treating the North like a dottie old aunt you have locked up in your attic. Their attitude was so bad that even China and Russia signed on to new sanctions with barely a peep. Publicly, China is still siding with the North, but, behind closed doors, their attitude has been much more severe, say sources with in the country. They don't want  a nuclear war on their doorstep, especially if it can be avoided. North Korea is falling apart. Let's hope they don't take the world with them. If you want a reason why I don't want Iran to get nukes, here is a prime example. So congratulation North Korea and Kim Jung Un, you are indeed douchebag of the week.

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