Thursday, December 11, 2014

DOUCHEBAG OF THE WEEK: DICK CHENEY, THE CIA AND EVERYONE ELSE CONNECTED WITH TORTURING INNOCENT PEOPLE

When did the US become Nazi Germany? We live in a proto-fascist society, where the police behave like psychopathic brigands, where our leaders break every rule imaginable, and where our people have become too dumb and divided to realize how bad things really are. Where are the mass protests calling for the heads of all those connected with this atrocity? Why aren't Republicans hanging their heads in shame for being connected to all of this? Have we lost all sense of morality? Is hope lost? Let's see those runner ups in an abbreviated week, as I have Christmas shopping to do.
10)Paul Rosalie- Any idiot trying to be eaten by a snake and filming it, should have his next trick being beaten with sticks by an angry mob until he passes out. I do not know which is worse, the fact that this dick actually spent months designing a suit that ultimately failed when he pussed out or that I was rooting for the snake. For all the fools that watched this, I feel your pain as I sat through Geraldo Rivera's opening Al Capone's tomb as well as a live Great Pyramid show sending a robot down an unexplored passage. Both ended badly, with hours of my life I will never get back. Let's hope this kind of "entertainment" comes to an end after this.

9)TGIF- As way as food goes, I rate TGIF somewhere between Denny's and Applebee's. Denny's is diner-ish and Abblebee's is just plain terrible. It's not a place I go to regularly, or even at all, as it's been years since I've gone to one but their latest stunt to get people in the doors was just stupid. Some bright executive said "Hey wouldn't it be great if we had a drone flying mistletoe above the heads of our customers. What could possibly go wrong with a sharp spinning blade and an enclosed space?" That question was quickly answered after a reporter lost the tip of her nose when a drone malfunctioned. Yeah, great business plan. What's next? The Russian Roulette plate where they offer six items, one of which has been sprinkled with industrial strength laxatives? Or maybe a gang themed night where patrons can duck from gun fire as they enjoy your appetizers? I am guessing someone is looking for a new job after this fiasco.

8)Lena Dunham- This has been a bad week for rape victims. Hot on the heels of a stunningly awful story written about a rape on the University of Virginia that appears to be complete bullshit (her story has no proof at all and plenty against it), comes the fact that Girls star Lena Dunham's story in her autobiography about being raped by a Republican while in college is also having some truth problems. Why are women lying about one of the worst things that can happen? I know lots of rape victims, way too many actually, and everytime one of these losers comes forward with a made-up tale for some attention, it demeans people who actually suffered through it. I am no Lena Dunham fan, although on screen I find her funny, her off screen persona rubs me the wrong way a lot. Kind of like Tom Cruise, Kelsey Grammar and others whose shows or movies I like but behind closed doors come off kind of dickish or insane. The publisher is planning on recalling the books and may face a lawsuit from the guy she "named." Stop looking for attention ladies in the worst possible way.

7)The economy- Showing how out of touch the economy is with the rest of the world, the Dow rose over 200 points at one point today (Now as of 3 PM, it is up 98), even though yesterday's sell off was because the world economy was fading. Nothing has changed other than some questionable retail spending figures that I am willing to bet will be revised downward when looked at closer, as this happens all the time lately. The government says "Good news everyone" and everyone cheers but a few days later they quietly admit they vastly overestimated the previous numbers and they were actually far lower. They once missed the housing stats by a whopping 36%. We are being lied to and apparently the people running Wall Street either don't care or are too stupid to understand. Either way, do not believe anything you hear from government stats until days after the fact when people like myself study them and revisions are made.

6)The Golden Globes- This was an excellent year for genre pictures. If you liked action, comedy or spectacle, there was plenty to choose from. Prestige pictures however were in short supply and this year's Golden Globes certainly demonstrate that. I have seen less than 10% of the nomination in every category. Last year, I saw 90% of the films nominated before the awards show. This year, I will be lucky to see a quarter. Television fared no better with the odd decision to keep placing nominees like Orange is the New Black as a comedy, which it isn't. As a result, funny previous noms like Brooklyn Nine Nine, Modern Family and the Big bang Theory got ZERO nods. Movies that should have been nomined like Interstellar, Unbroken and American Sniper got shut out, while The Grand Budapest Hotel snags a comedy nod, even though I find Wes Anderson movies as funny as a root canal. These are going to be one really boring awards show and makes the Oscar race even more boring. YAWN!

5)Sony- These guys got hacked by a group calling themselves the Guardians of Peace, or the somewhat ironic GOP, and released lots of personal info about the stars, their salaries and worst of all, emails from producers to each other. The best came from Scott Rudin who went off on stars like Angelina Jolie, but people should be aware that these emails should not be treated as gospel as a lot of these guys have the mental maturity of a hyper three year old with ADD. I've worked with people like this when I worked in the entertainment industry and they are abundant. Way to protect yourself guys.
4)North Korea- These guys appear to be behind the hack of Sony as they are threatening them with bigger problems if they release The Interview, the Seth Rogan/James Franco film about two reporters killing Kim Jung Un. The producers of said picture could not be happier because this is tons of free advertising that is going to make a lot of people see the movie to see what all the fuss is about. I am one of them as I think this film looks to be one of the funniest of the year. Go spend your money when this comes out and tell Kim Jung Un to suck it.

3)Angela Preston- I used to watch America's Next Top model as I worked for the modeling company that started it all. That was before the owner went to prison for stealing money from his company and Wilhelmina absorbed them, but I was a fan for a while until it just got old, especially when they got rid of all the judges, ala American Idol, and made the show unwatchable. Now a contestant from season 17, Preston, is suing saying she was denied the grand prize because she worked as a hooker before the show. Problem is, they knew about it before hand, and cut her for completely legitimate reasons as happens on every single reality show ever. You lost, get over it.

2)The Spending Bill- If torture hadn't been thrown out there earlier this week, this would have been my top pick. There is something in here for everyone to hate. The left says the downgrading of the EPA, cutting of pensions and the losing of bank rules to allow them to bankrupt the country again has the left up in arms. The right hates the fact that Obamacare is still funded as is Obama's amnesty plan. It's a good thing we still have plenty of time to fix this mess as it barely passed a procedural vote and was pulled for the moment as chances of it actually passing was nil. Wait what? What do you mean at midnight we run of money? They waited until the last minute to foist this garbage bill on it in the hopes that people wouldn't dare vote against it, and guess what, they did. Leaders are struggling to fix this stat but it looks bad and Congress may have to pass yet another short term bill that will get us nowhere, especially when the dunderhead Republicans take over next year. Thanks America, you may have voted us into extinction.
1)Dick Cheney, the CIA, George W. Bush and the rest of the clown car from the early part of the 21st century- Turns out our morphing into Nazi Germany is complete with the previous administration freely admitting they committed war crimes. Dick Cheney, while speaking to Fox News said Bush was never out of the loop and "was in fact an integral part of the program and he had to approve it." When asked if Bush knew about the details of the torture program, Cheney danced  around the answer saying : "We did discuss the techniques. There was no effort on our part to keep him from that." The Powers that Be say the report is "crap" even though subsequent studies say the CIA got little to no useful information and a lot of the best stuff they got from prisoners was before they even layed a hand on them. While our idiot President has been just terrible lately from his approval of a shitty spending bill (which Nancy Pelosi called disgusting) to NOT arresting everyone involved with this and thus saving face with the rest of then Earth, shows what a spineless waste of space this man is. Good news though, the UN is investigating and if they decide war crimes have been committed, that is legally binding due to the Geneva Convention and Bush, Cheney and a host of others, including race traitors like Colin Powel and Condoleezza Rice, may be facing the death penalty. Oh boy would I want tickets to that show. As the UN is hardly US friendly, this may end badly for all involved. So congratulations, to everyone involved in torturing people for no reason at all, you are indeed douchebags of the week and a surefire contender for douchebag of the year.

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