DOUCHEBAG OF THE WEEK: THE AMERICAN CONSUMER

Black Friday came and went and nobody seemed to care that, in order to get those cut rate prices, Big Box stores are engaging in slave labor practices. For shame. Let's see those runner ups.

1)Lindsey Stone- Not realizing that by posting idiotic crap on your Facebook page can get you fired, this brain power decided to test that axiom and lost big time. Stone, while at Arlington Cemetery, posted this picture seen above in a horrific attempt at Hipster Irony. I hate Hipster Irony. First off, it's never funny. Pictures like this may have been funny fifty years ago when they first cropped up but now it's just sad and dated. Second, what part of respect did you not get Lindsey? These soldiers died for us and you think it's funny to flip the bird in a misguided attempt at humor. Not surprisingly, she and the person who took the picture were fired. Free speech means you have the right to say what you want but, at the same time, you also have to deal with the consequences of your actions. If I wrote a blog were I did nothing but slur minorities, my employers may have second thoughts about my job. Grow up, Lindsey and stop these pointless attempts at humor. You are NOT funny.

2)Chris Brown- This king high douche recently had to cancel a concert performance in Guyana after women's groups protested the fact that this ass had beaten Rhianna in the past, gotten a neck tattoo celebrating it and, hopefully, for his god awful music that sounds like a duck being run over by a dump truck. It's a sad day for America when Guyana stands up this dick while we at home continue to buy his albums and nominate him for best R&B artist, which is odd because no singer in the last decade who won an R&B actually sings R&B. It's the equivalent of Metallica, Rancid and Jethro Tull vying for best country album. As someone who actually listens to REAL rhythm and blues, I am disgusted every time the category comes up. And please STOP listening to this guy if no other reason than his music is garbage.

3)Lisa Biron- This NH lawyer has been connected with an anti-gay, Christian group, Alliance Defending Freedom, who fight against gay marriage, adoption by gay couples and other bigoted nonsense. Turns out kiddie porn was not is her wheelhouse of things to be against as she was arrested this week for transporting a teen girl into Canada to have sex with an adult male and then filmed the whole thing. Maybe I missed that part of Sunday school but I don't remember the Lord saying sex with kids was okay. Even worse, she is also accused of supplying drugs to area teens as well, including cocaine and ecstasy. James Dobson, the idiot head of the Focus on the Family group was one of the original charters for this group but is not involved with any of this crap. Yet. Usually when you turn over one rock, the bugs scatter everywhere. I wouldn't be surprised if more of these morons are involved as well in yet another kiddie porn scandal that envelops the rich, the powerful and the ultra religious.

4)Florida- This could quite possibility by the most inept state in the country. If you plan to murder someone make sure it is one of these three states: CA, CO or FL. Why? Because their police and judicial system are so messed up you could be filmed committing a crime and still walk. Florida has been in the cross hairs on a near regular basis for their Keystone cop-like method for solving crimes. This week it was discovered that Casey Anthony had Googled the words "foolproof suffocation" days before her daughter died. The defense story that it was her father that had looked up the words came up in trial and helped seal her freedom. The only problem is it wasn't true and the police department knew it. Turns out rather than do their fucking job, they only turned over less than 2% of the browser history and failed to inform the prosecution about this search as "they missed it." It also couldn't have been her father or mother as both were confirmed elsewhere during the time the words were punched in, also not realized by the police. Wow, way to let a murderer go free, losers.

5)Owners against Obamacare- Much like Lindsey Stone, these assholes haven't realized that free speech means consequences and these guys are paying for it. The CEO's of Denny's and Applebees have issued several press releases saying that the statements from franchise owners do NOT represent the values of the corporation itself who plan on implementing Obamacare freely and openly. Both companies said that the statements of a few individual franchise owners do not represent the plans from a majority of the businesses that will abide by the new law. The reason they said this was, contrary to what Fox News and conservative sites keep saying. Obamacare is very popular with a majority of the population. The biggest loser was the one guy who speaks for an entire company, John Schnatter of Papa John's. His profits have plummeted since opening his mouth and has been forced to issue an apology. Sort of. Now he says he was "misquoted," and was only using Obamacare as an example for a class he was teaching at the time and he has no plans to cut hours to save money. Right. You got caught saying something stupid, people rebelled against you and stopped buying your shitty pizza and now you have to backtrack something fierce. Most people I have talked with are saying too little, too late John. I hope you go bankrupt you rich fuck.

6)SF nudists- Nudity has finally been banned in San Fransisco after a bunch of tree hugging, dirt munching homos kept parading their winkled sacs and sagging breasts all over town. I am for personal freedom but the last thing I want to see is your nasty taint as you bend over to pick up poo from your foo foo dog which has more clothes on than you do. The notoriously gay Castro district was the big offender as many people, mostly men, shoved their wang in everyone's faces for predictably horrific consequences. I don't care if your gay, bi or whatever. But the last thing I want to see is your genitalia while I am having more morning cornflakes. This is free speech taken way to far.

7)Israel-Having bowed to international pressure AGAIN, Israel is the big loser in all of this. Palestinians are seeing this as a win and shows a direct correlation between violence and getting what they want. They have been shouting the usual "death to US/Israel." They show no sign of actual good faith negotiations. Meanwhile, Gaza will restock their weapons, which Iran has been more than happy to oblige, meaning all of this will happen again and the whole farce will begin anew. I am sick of watching wars be fought as a slap fight between two children, while one hides a knife behind his back.

8)Egypt- Fresh off the new power gotten from ending the Gaza war, the new President Morsi has responded by a power grab at home that has sent the country back into revolution mode. In an exact repeat of what ousted Mubarck, non-fanatical Muslims, secularists, and Coptic Christians have gathered in Tahir Square again with similar results. Tear gas and riot police are attacking the protesters who are responding with Molotov cocktails and rocks. The more things change, the more they stay the same.

9)Republicans still harping about Benghazi- Ronald Regan was president when almost 300 Marines died in Lebanon. George Bush was president when 3000 citizens died during 9/11. GOP outcry-0. Must be nice to be so hypocritical. Stop this witch hunt and get down to fixing the problems that are real and imminent.

10)American Consumers- People flocked to the stores this past weekend to get deals and huge sales. They acted like animals, where some were shot, some robbed, some trampled. Is this what we have become: a mob mentality where everything is about me, me, me? Look, I understand most of you out there do this because you make shit money at your crappy job and this is the only way to afford anything anymore. We know this to be true because even though foot traffic was up, total sales were down. People have less money to spend because corporations are squeezing us hard and no one wants to stand up to them. Walmart employees chickened out on a planned strike as they didn't want to risk their crappy job. Are you telling me you can't find another job that pays slave wages in your town? Please. A lot of these morons have been working at Walmart for six plus years. When I worked at jobs I hated, and there have been many of those, I spent every waking minute looking for something better and, surprise, I usually found one in less than a year that paid much better. If you are working for nothing and are NOT looking for something better you are one fucking lazy ass who deserves what you get which is nothing at this point. Unless we all start demanding better wages and better working conditions, things are going to get worse and worse. You think what you make is bad now, wait until the economy flat lines and see what you get then. Then we have these Internet trolls who don't understand that unions, for all their faults, are being dismantled, and with it our wages and benefits. Without collective bargaining, our wages have nose dived over the years and the conservative morons keep saying we should be happy to have a job, just like the slaves at plantations in the 1800's should have been happy to have a roof over their heads and gruel to eat. Go fuck yourself to anyone who keeps writing this crap. And to those idiots who keep bitching about those of us who pay no income taxes and that unions are the bane of our existence you are indeed douchebag of the week.