Sunday, February 8, 2015


Nobody on the entire Earth fucked up as bad as ISIS did this week. Instead of rallying people to your cause, you made both the Japanese and 99% of the Middle East angry with you. Trust me when I say from experience, you do NOT want the Japanese mad at you. Those people are brutal when they want to be. I just finished reading Unbroken and found out that POW's in Germany and Italy had a 1% fatality rate. In Japan it was 37%. And those POW's got tortured something fierce. Hell is coming to ISIS. They just do not know it yet. Let's see those runner ups.

10)Bruce Jenner- What a waste of Olympic talent. The former gold medalist proved to be as vapid as his step daughters, is apparently having a sex change even though he is in his sixties, and is now being investigated for a fatal car crash. Sobriety and cell phone records have not been released but if he fails either, he may be going to jail for vehicular homicide. Of course if he does, there is a good chance his sex change operation will be picked up the taxpayers like the murderer here in MA who is doing just that to the horror of its citizens. I freaking hate the Kardashians and this loser is no better.

9)Brian Williams- I am a little torn on this because one hand I see people's point that a newsman should be honest above all else but on the other hand memory is not as accurate as many think. There are parts of my memory where I question whether it actually happened or not. As time passes, memory gets fuzzy and unreliable and my memory is near perfect. I can still remember meals I had forty years ago, from appetizer to dessert, still tell you what three movies are on any of my now extinct, elaborate, video collection and even tell you what clothes you had on when we last met, and even I question some of what I remember. If someone like me can't tell fact from fiction, neither can Brian Williams. It's possible, he remembers things differently and it's not like he's Bill Cosby of anything. Brian Williams can read the news just fine and if anything we should be more pissed at the news he reads, not the past he may be mixing up.
8)Conrad Hilton- This total fuckwad is the example of why I HATE rich people. Apparently, his king high douchiness went crazy on a flight recently where he threatened passengers and crew, smoked weed and cigarettes in the bathroom and had to be physically restrained. My favorite part is when he called people "peasants," threatened to have everyone fired and that his father would pay $300,000 to make all of this go away. This is what we have become: a feudal society where the rich treat the rest of us like serfs because they know chances are good they will never see the inside of a courtroom. That didn't work out so well for a Korean heiress who ordered a plane back to the airport because her nuts were served to her in a bag rather than a plate. She faces five years in prison with a society who has had it with this kind of entitlement. We can only hope this country does the same to this idiot.

7)Thom Tillis- The junior senator from NC proved why he never should have won when he went after signs that reminded employees at restaurants to wash their hands, an overuse of regulations he said. What he wanted to do instead is have a different regulation that would have signs out front telling you employees at this restaurant do not have to wash their hands, which would soon be shut down by the health department after people come down with e-coli in mass numbers. What a stupid thing to say and they lost Kay Hagan for this? Republicans are fucking morons.
6)Governor John Hickenlooper- Proving that not just Republicans are schmucks comes this bon mot from Colorado's governor when he recently said that the legalization of pot so far has been "reckless," and the state never should have done it. This strikes me as beyond stupid because by all measures, it appears to be working better than thought. Tax revenues have exceeded expectations so much that taxpayers may get some of that money back. Crime is down and some, but not all, studies, say teen pot use is down. Yeah, if this is failure, I'd hate to see what success looks like.

5)Ellen Brody- Some stories, like this one, make me seriously question mankind's ability to not eventually kill the planet. This woman was so stupid, so brainless, I am stunned she made it 49 years on this Earth before some fatality claimed her. This moron drove onto the tracks during a traffic jam, unaware that common sense says you wait until the other side has room and then move forward. I saw this recently in Boston where people were blocking traffic because they refused to acknowledge that the light they were waiting at would eventually turn red and they would be stuck in the middle of the road, This went on for twenty minutes before I finally got around them. If I had a gun, I would have killed dozens. So while Brody was on the tracks, a train came and the gates come down, striking her car. She calmly got out, surveyed the damage, got back in, but her seat belt on and, shockingly, moved forward right into the path of an oncoming train, killing her and five others on the train. This is stupidity so profound, she actually killed others from it. I can only hope her kids are not this dumb or they'll never see adulthood.
4)Republicans- It has been a banner week for the GOP. We have Scott Walker being force fed down out throats as the best hope for the Republicans taking the White House, even though during a recent ABC interview, he had zero ideas of where to take the country that haven't either already been tried and failed or vague enough to have no real idea if they would work. I HATE Walker and so do the Dropkick Murphy's who demanded he stop suing their songs during campaign stops. Rand Paul and Chris Christie got involved in the idiotic anti-vaccine bullshit, only to be smacked down by their own party so hard they had to back down stat and flip-flop on everything they said previously. Christie is also being investigated for another criminal flap, or maybe he isn't as the feds are being shockingly tight lipped about any of this and are denying earlier reports. So much for transparency. Tillis of NC has proven why he never should have been elected in the first place. One of the funniest exchanges took place between representatives of Florida and Texas, when the democrat called the republican congressman and his entire state of Texas, crazy and refused to apologize for it. That was classic.
3)Warren Sapp- The former football player had a bad week after he was arrested for soliciting a prostitute while working the Super Bowl last week-end. Guess who got fired soon after? Really, you couldn't watch some porn and use your hand like the rest of us? So instead you picked up some nasty, diseased hooker. EEEEWWWWW! You deserve to get fired if you thought any of this was a good idea. Even worse, he was also booked on an assault charge against said hooker as well which is how all this got started when she called police. When a hooker calls the cops on you, you've known you've gone too far. Enjoy retirement because you sir are done.

2)Seahawks- These guys had it in the bag and blew it. And contrary to everything you have heard, Pete Carroll did NOT make the worst decision known to man as on either the second or third down he HAD to call a throw and thought he might get the Patriots off guard if he did it then. We all know now that he didn't, as Belichick was ready for this and had the Patriots move in to cut off the slant which is exactly when they went with. That is excellent coaching from the Patriots which resulted in the biggest loss in the history of the game because Patriots fans were ready to lose, Seahawks were ready to win and then it all went to hell. Check out Seahawks losing on video. There are some hysterical ones, including one with a young Japanese woman, that is a dead ringer for my fiancĂ©. We love that one.
10)ISIS- These guys need to go away. And thanks to them burning a pilot alive, the rest of the world is ready to do just that. Jordan and Japan both want blood and the Middle East agrees with them. Hell, even countries Iran. Syria and Al Qaeda agree that ISIS has gone too far. When other terrorist groups say you've gone too far, you've gone WAY too far. Jordan has in turn doubled their bombing campaigns and are readying ground troops for a possible invasion. Support for anti-ISIS groups is hitting fever pitch and these douchebags may be nearing their end of their run. Good. So congratulations ISIS you are indeed douchebag of the week.

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