Monday, February 2, 2015


No matter the winner or loser in this game, it was the greatest Superbowl ever. Both teams played fantastic. Both teams made monumental screw ups. But in the end, Tom Brady proved why he is the greatest quarterback to ever play the game and Pete Carroll has to explain to a beyond pissed home crowd why he didn't give the ball to Billy Cole, wait that's The Last Boy Scout, I mean Marshawn Lynch, nicknamed "Beast Mode," to win the game from the one yard line.

I kind of get where he was coming from. Carroll wanted to have three shots at the end zone in case the first two failed, so he went for a quick slant which, as we all know now, resulted in an interception and the end of the game. In hindsight, giving the ball to Lynch three times was the better call, especially as he had one, possibly two, time outs left (I honestly can't remember and looking up such a trivial thing seems a waste).

My fiancée tried not to watch the game and put on an air of not caring, but she whooped louder than me when that interception came about. She told me later that she could feel me vibrating next to her in anticipation and didn't want to add to my stress. She's awesome. And so was this game.

I have watched every Superbowl since I can remember and no game had me on the edge of my seat like this one. They were up, they were down, they were up again, and then came the CATCH. Somehow, someway, a Seattle player made the most extraordinary catch, bobbling the ball up the in the air as he rolled on the ground, hitting it no less than three times before catching it. Worse, from the first angle, it totally looked like it hit the ground so I was thrilled at first until the announcer chimed in and showed it from a second angle that showed some extreme agility, blind luck, and for what appeared to be the second time, a game changing catch. At that moment, every Pats fan everywhere immediately flashed on the Giants game in 2011 where another miraculous catch happened as the player pinned the ball to his head as he fell over backwards, as if it was glued to him and causing the Patriots to end an otherwise perfect season. We are still bitter over that.
No one, and I mean NO ONE, thought this would be any different from the 2011 Superbowl loss as Lynch made it all the way to the one yard line. And then came the call, the one that would end the game and make The Butler Did it, a rallying cry in Boston, as number 21, rookie Malcolm Butler, made the game winning interception and sent the Seahawks packing. I watched that play fifty times, laughing ever time the receiver gets hip checked into no man's land as Butler cleanly catches the ball. On the sidelines, Brady jumped about as Richard Sherman, a hell of player by the way, mouthed the words "NNOOOOOOOO!" I loved it and instead of sadness champagne, I had celebration Champaign, as it was getting drunk either way. It tasted much better than 2011.

Number 51, Bruce Irvin, was ejected from the game for acting like a little bitch. After a penalty in the finals seconds ended any chance of a miracle win from Seahawks, Bruce Irvin started throwing punches at Gronk, big mistake as that man is a monster, ran away after Gronk tagged him good and hid behind a ref and then went after another, smaller player, throwing him onto the ground. Today he "apologized" as he said he was only protecting his team, but I watched that fight over and over again, and he was the aggressor every time. This is a lack of class. You lost, deal. On the flip side, I would like to point out that the reason Boston is one of the best cities on Earth, when we celebrate, no one gets hurt, no one attacks the cops, who truth be told do an excellent job at crowd control that every else should emulate (don't act like douches while preventing idiots from doing the same), and we behave like human beings and not drunken cats hissing and spitting at everyone. We win a lot so maybe we just act like it too.
And then there are the commercials which overall, I thought we're better than last years. Budweiser had another heart puller and Doritos nailed it with the airline seat commercial. One complaint that I and everyone else is wondering, when did Superbowl Sunday become some glum and depressing? We got treated to everyone's most hated commercial, Nationwide, where some kid is talking about all the ways he died due to negligent parents. What a bummer that I do NOT want while I am drinking and have a good time. Hey we know you're hammered but isn't now a good time to think about insurance and your kid dying from something stupid? NO! Can we have one freaking moment please where we can just have some fun?
The best of the best hands down was Danny Trejo as Marcia Brady which was hysterical. The above mentioned from Doritos and Budweiser and the ad for Chevrolet that made it seem as if the cable was going out got a hundred million people to held their breath for a second, riveted on the screen, which means you got everyone to pay attention. Kudos. Esurance did well with their two spots with Lindsey Lohan and Walter White and trailers for Jurassic World and Terminator were grabbers. The best trailer was for Ted 2 which showed them breaking into Tom Brady's house with hysterical results. Find that one on line. The Fiat ad with a lost Viagra was quite clever and Liam Nisson's video game ad was also really funny. They even had a tampon commercial for Always that was funny and female oriented without being crass.

The flip side had way to many somber ads with the only one that really worked was an actual 911 call tied to a PSA about domestic violence. I had heard this before as a woman orders a pizza to disguise the fact she is actually calling the police. Brilliant. Nationwide missed the mark, the target and the side of the barn with that super depressing ad about kid deaths. Christ, what a downer. Not the right time guys for this. Another ad for toe fungus was gross and a waste of four million as everyone ignored that ad good.  Another one that some liked, and others like me thought sucked, was Nissan's With Dad commercial, which first off in no way shows off the car until the end, and then just barely at that, all the while playing Harry Chapin's Cats in the Cradle, who died in a car crash, while simultaneously showing car crashes during a NASCAR race. Tasteless and a waste of 12 million dollars.
So that's it. Defaltegate, Ball-ghazi or whatever you want to call it is over. The Patriots won fair and square this time so get over it because THE PATRIOTS WON THE SUPERBOWL! YEAH! Mother Nature must have known because a big snowstorm got a lot of people the day off today so celebrations continue. Look out 2015 because the Pats will be going back next year. Deal with them being one of the greatest football teams ever haters. They are here to stay.

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