This has been a monumental week for sky high douchebaggery. There were at least four groups or individuals who on any other given week would have gotten the grand prize. But let's be clear, no one deserved it more than contender for douchebag of the year, Martin Shkreli, CEO of Turing Pharma, who did something few can: united the country no matter race, creed, color or political affiliation in agreeing that this guy is a giant douchebag. Let's see those runner ups for which many are real doozies.
10)Leslie Allen Merrit- This is quite possibly the stupidest man on the face of this Earth. To quote Animal House "Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life." He was arrested this week for several of the freeway shootings that took place in Arizona on route 10 these past few months. His defense was a novel one and said that his gun had been in the pawn shop for the last two months. Unfortunately for him, not only do pawn shops keep excellent records (by law they have to), the cops were trailing him the day he pawned the rifle which was just hours before he was arrested. They had the weapon, ballistics and video of him in the pawn shop. Set, game and match. Hope you like prison dumb ass for no real reason as shooting at cars is just stupid on so many levels. What a fool.
9)Buffalo Bills- Right now the Pats are obliterating the Jaguars, 44 to 10. The last two wins by the Pats have been marred by cry baby coaches who got outplayed and grasped at straws to explain how the other team cheated this week. The Steelers blamed the headphones, which was nonsense as the Patriots have no access to the headphones or the network that runs it. The Bills brought up the Patriots "cheater" history as to how they won, without explaining of course how they cheated to win. The ironic part is that the Bills DID cheat during the game, as they kept playing music when the Patriots were at the line of scrimmage, a league no no. And they still lost. Losers. I wonder what the Jaguars will come up with to explain their massive loss to a much better team?
8)Lee Daniels- I am not a huge fan of this guy and his latest racist tirade got him into a lot of hot water. While idiotically defending Terrance Howard, a real dirt bag by the way and a screaming prima donna as well who has admitted beating his ex-wife, the director said Howard hasn't done anything Marlon Brando and Sean Penn haven't done as well. The only problem with this inflammatory statement is that it is in no way true. Neither Brando nor Penn have ever been even accused of domestic issues, let alone arrested. Brando is dead so he cannot defend himself but Sean Penn is suing Daniels for ten million dollars for defamation. Good. Couldn't he have picked Ike Turner or Chris Brown instead as an example? Oh that's right, they are both black and he needed a white devil to demonize instead. Next time pick on someone who actually did the thing you accuse them of, stupid.
7) Stephen Goddard- The writer for the strangely named RealScience blog, which is a terrible name as it actually contains no real science. I have looked into his allegations of global warming fraud and feel it is no better than Holocaust deniers and the "evidence" they collect. His site is filled with graphs that appear made up as they fly in the face of video evidence and what experts have been saying for years. The dumbest thing is he keeps claiming the Arctic, Antarctic and Greenland are all gaining ice, which we can see with our own eyes is not occurring. The fact that so many countries are fighting over Arctic resources as the ice is thinning faster and faster says his research is crap as there is no way they would fight over something they could not get to. This ass is why no one believes anyone or anything anymore and is leading to the destruction of society. F him.
6)Saudi Arabia- This week at least 750 people died during a stampede during the annual trek to Mecca took place. Because of lax security, something they have been warned about many times in the past, hundreds, perhaps a thousand, are dead. And it is not like they don't have the money to adequately fix this which begs the questions "Why are Jews called cheap and not Arabs?" This has lead to a lot of problems with Iran pissed at Saudi Arabia and may be in part responsible for clashes in Israel as well. These two sides are never going to get along so maybe we should lock them in a room and let them duke it out once and for all.
5)Carly Fiorina- Thankfully, her rise seems to have stalled, meaning that only 11% of the Republican party is too stupid to vote. Still the worst choice for president, perhaps ever, the media started ripping her a new one this week. Set aside her horrific decisions while CEO, she also committed fraud and treason. She sold parts to Iran while CEO of HP, which was illegal at the time and should have resulted in a criminal probe at the least and also took money from the government meant for job creation and used it for stock buybacks instead, again which got no look at by the SEC even though it was illegal. This bitch has got to go. Also, I see pictures of children pushing for her which should result in them being taken away from the parents for child abuse and neglect. Only an idiot would back this witch who needs to go away. Far, far away.
4)Tea Party Republicans- They anarchists got their wish his week and John Boehner is stepping down from the House at the end of next month. Unfortunately for them, it also means that Obama's budget will most likely pass, perhaps even to the end of his term. The Planned Parenthood shutdown will not happen now and this will save the Republican party from self destructing. Got to give to Boehner, he fell on his sword to save the party. That's brave. Now mind you, by doing this he sets himself up for a cushy job from the establishment for the thanks in doing it, but he also marginalizes the out of control remnants from the Tea Party. If the budget does indeed pass until next December, he will save fallout from an idiotic Congress bent on self destruction. The bad news is that whoever gets the job will fare no better in getting things done without compromise, a non-starter. These fools are hell bent on destroying the government, not fixing it. And that bodes well for no one.
3)Volkswagen- Any other week, these guys would be at the top of the heap. Seems they decided to cheat emission standards by rigging data in their favor. Turns out, their diesel engines are not quite as clean as they claimed. This was done to save money but will instead cost them tens of billions in fines and repairs, not to mention hugely damaging the brand. The CEO was forced to step down and they cannot sell any of the cars that have this defect in it any time soon. I love when companies screw themselves for a few bucks. Contrary to popular belief, greed is not good.
2)Stewart Parnell- This guy took it in the balls this week when the former Peanut CEO got sentenced to 28 years in Federal prison for killing 9 people with tainted peanut butter that he knew was tainted and sold it anyway. What a dick! I am actually stunned he even saw a trial as we usually let CEO's off with a slap on the wrist and a fine for killing people like GE, Bard Inc. and Toyota did to their customers. It didn't help that he emailed everything that nailed him to the wall. As he is 61, this former millionaire is going to die behind bars in a prison with murders, rapists and the scum of society. No country club for him, he will see how hard tough guy prison is not to mention his fortune will disappear in the flood of lawsuits he is looking at. He got what he deserved.
10)Martin Shkreli- The most hated man on Earth has gone into hiding which may be for some time. After hiking a life saving drug for people with cancer and AIDS from $13.50 a pill to $750, Shkreli faced a mountain of bad press from all sides. Normal people were pissed that this asshole was profiting from sick people. Rich people were pissed because their stock portfolio took a major hit when Big Pharma stocks dropped across the board. Big Pharma was REALLY pissed because now everyone is looking at their outrageous prices and screaming bloody murder, making their profits almost certain to drop, especially if new legislation cripples their ability to charge whatever they feel like. This guy could be assassinated from a multitude of people, which no one would cry two seconds over should it happen. Hell, if I was on the jury, that person would walk with a hearty handshake and a big thank you for offing this horrific douche of a human. So congratulations Martin Shkreli, you are indeed douchebag of the week. We will be seeing you again on my douchebag of the year column.