IOWA CAUCUS 2016: WHO WON, WHO LOST AND WHO QUIT!

What a night. Ted Cruz won, Hillary somehow both won and lost, and a lot of candidates died a painful death at the ballot box. It showed the GOP Caucus was far better run than the Democratic side which seemed less like a voting process and more like a game of Red Rover gone horribly wrong. People stand up and debate each other as people mingle on opposite sides of a room to say who they want to vote for. Viewers on C-Span watching one such prescient vote, noticed huge irregularities in the way the vote was counted, coming in hundreds short than the first count had originally. Once again, the leadership of resident harpy Debbie Wasserman Shultz rears its ugly head again and shows how out of her depth she really is.

The GOP had a clear winner and that winner is NOT Trump which I find hysterical. He spent at least seven hours off of Twitter with no pithy insults for being a LOSER because I doubt his brain could handle the fact he LOST. I just love writing that. Trump lost. Trump lost. Trump LOST. God, that feels good. Unfortunately, an even worse candidate did win and that is the moron that is Ted Cruz. The good news is that Iowa is well known for picking losers and it seems unlikely that his momentum will continue into NH. The bad news, is he may still be competitive in the South and Midwest. Other than Carly Fiorina, Ted Cruz is the worst choice for president we have. He will kill us all with his absolute stupid policies. I also doubt he has any chance of winning, even if gets the nomination. His candidacy will get first time voters out to vote against him in droves, even if that demon Hillary is his opponent.

The big winner from the GOP side was Marco Rubio who came in a close third, inches behind Trump and is now the establishment candidate. This propels him into NH with a full head of steam and may siphon some votes off of Trump who may now be ruing the day he skipped the last debate as that seemed to hurt him far more than either I or most of us thought. Rubio is going to get lots of money and support from the rest of the candidates that are dead men walking.

Two got the hint and quit yesterday. The ballots weren't even done yet when Martin O'Malley announced he was giving up. As he secured less than 1% of the vote, that seemed wise. He waited too long to get in, Bernie Sanders stole his thunder, and he had no money for ads. I see NH ads all the time and I have never seen one ad for him. Literally everyone else had an ad but him in this area. I even saw ads for Pataki before he gave up. With no money, you have no chance in this kind of race. Mike Huckabee also got the hint that it was time to go as he finished near last in the Iowa polls, the state having moved on from his win way back in distant 2008. The funny part is that everyone below Rubio is also done, including Jebra Bush who can look forward to retirement after NH because he is doing even worse there, Carly Fiorina whose support has collapsed in recent months, and Ben Carson who many may think quit weeks ago with his stealth presidential campaign. Expect more to give up after NH, with the few stragglers left to compete after Super Tuesday.

The Sanders campaign can claim victory even if they did indeed lost, which is still open for debate. News media service have reported that 90 sub-prescients still haven't finalized their count yet and one county prescient hasn't given their data at all. This could be 2012 all over again where everyone thought Mitt Romney won until a second count showed Rick Santorum won by 34 votes. Sanders campaign has suggested that we never know the actual results which seems a little shady for the strongest country on the planet. We can put men on the moon but we can't count accurately?

It has also be noted that coin tosses decided six prescients, all of which went Hillary's way which is one in 64 odds. This is not out of the realm of chance but still. And why coin tosses? How about a revote until one side wins? Would rock, paper, scissors be acceptable? High card? This just seems so arbitrary.

Clinton, if she did indeed win, barely did so, which has to be blow considering she was 50 points ahead last year. Sanders can claim victory just by not getting blown out and only losing by a few tenths of a percentage points. Young people should be commended for coming out in droves to vote for Bernie giving me some small hope for the future. Old people on the other hand should just hurry up and die already for voting for this bitch over Sanders. She is the status quo and certain death down the road. Bernie represents hope. What is so hard to understand about that?

NH is a week away and Trump and Sanders look to capture the momentum they need to continue, which polls say is highly likely. Stay tuned for more on how this all turns out.